In a world where life is becoming increasingly busy and demanding, many people lose their balance. Mental health issues such as stress, fatigue, and overthinking are becoming more common. Marcel, a mental health coach at LifeCheck, recognizes these signs all too well: “Many people try to keep all the balls in the air, become exhausted, and at some point don’t even know where things went wrong,” he explains.
What can you help people with as a coach?
“Support for issues such as stress, low mood, or burnout should be tailored as much as possible to the individual. I coach people who feel they’ve lost control over a situation or their life and don’t know how to move forward. Together, we look at what you’re struggling with and identify the main cause of your difficulties at that moment. From there, we work toward a solution in a way that suits you. Sometimes that’s through exercises, sometimes through conversations, or another approach that works.”
What do you often see happening in sessions?
“I often see people feeling rushed. They feel they need to meet all sorts of expectations, from themselves and from others. They try to do everything at once, become overwhelmed, and as a result, develop complaints. This can show up as poor sleep, overthinking, worry, or physical symptoms. You might also feel tense or anxious. Then you end up in a kind of loop: because you’re tired, you worry more. And because you worry, you sleep worse. This makes you even more exhausted and drains your energy further.”
Why are so many people struggling with this nowadays?
“Life is busy. We spend a lot of time in our heads and don’t listen closely to our bodies. We ignore the signals and just keep going until we can’t anymore. Many people try to meet what others expect of them: at school, work, from neighbors, partners, or social media. And that is very exhausting.”
Step 1: Map out your complaints
“Try to take a step back and look at everything going on in your life, as if you were sitting on a high chair with an overview. Write it down, for example: What’s happening at work? What’s happening at home? Do you have enough time for yourself? Are you worried about money? Does your job still suit you?”
Step 2: What is the most important place to start?
“Once you’ve written everything down, see where you’re struggling the most. What would make the biggest difference if you tackled it first? Choose one thing. This helps you stay focused.
Also, look at where the problem comes from. For example, if you’re very busy at work: is it because you never say ‘no’? Or because you downplay yourself in front of your manager? Or because you always want to help others, even at your own expense? Understanding the cause helps you make more targeted changes.”
Step 3: What exactly happens?
“Look at the situations in which your complaints get worse. Who or what triggers them? What do you think or do in those moments? What do you feel in your body? And how do you view your own reactions in such situations? Knowing this often helps you understand why it happens at that time.”
Step 4: How would you like it to be different?
“Once you understand the source of your complaints, you can think about how you’d like things to be different. How would you like to feel in that situation? What would you like to do differently? Write down your goal. If the goal feels too big, break it down into smaller, achievable steps.”
Step 5: Take a small step
“Think of a small step you can take this week. Make it really small so it’s achievable. Too big steps can make you feel insecure. For example: practice saying ‘no’ once when someone asks you to do something you don’t have time for, or get up ten minutes earlier so you can enjoy a calm cup of tea before starting your day. Small steps create moments of success and those build confidence.”
Is it difficult to do this alone?
“Yes, it can be. But with support, it usually becomes more manageable. You don’t have to do it alone. Through the app, it’s easy to ask for help, which really helps. People go to a physiotherapist for a knee injury without hesitation, but sometimes find it difficult to talk about stress or mental complaints. Yet it’s important to seek help early. The sooner you act, the easier it is to make a change.
Stress or burnout isn’t visible like a broken arm, yet it can seriously affect your life. When in doubt: reach out. A 45-minute session with a coach can already help you gain perspective and see which steps you can take.”
